A way to express

Let me tell you something about myself...

There was a time, when I knew a single world, a single language, a single family. Then my mother came along and told me stories of what and who I really was. She told me I had a father, up till that date, I have had a grandmother, an aunt and a brother. My mother was a woman in a picture and that day, she became real, she arrived from a far away land and filled up my head with tales and stories about another world, a colder world, a sad world. A world that had suffered a war. She spoke me in another language sometimes... and my up till then loving aunt began calling me 'the Russian one'. From that moment on, I think I was around 6 or 7 years old, I've been curios about it but most importantly, I became aware that there are other worlds.

Let me tell you about the present. I'm in England at the moment, surprisingly discovering another language. Trying to get back to my roots in this brand new laguage.
The tales my mother told me were about a man with an amazing mind. A man so smart, so claver, so intelligent... that could not coap with real life. He could not affort diappers, or food, or a room. He could just read and wirte, and draw and create, and love, deep inside he loved. But he was not made for real life. This man is my father, from whom I have a lot. I fight with that, everyday. I try to stay here, I try to stay real, reality. Everydayness....
That's what I do in England, I become real, but I swear to you that deep in side I am a writter too.
I grew up in a different world, a world that is called the thrid world here in England. Ecuador, South America, Latin America, The Andean region. Forgotten, beautiful, potentially powerful, such a soul-making character-shaping place.
I thought (I still think so, a litle bit) that I am never going to be the same one I was when I lived in between the Ecuadorian powerfully, lively, tall green grass... I just hope to be the same writter one day, and put my ideas acros again.
I need to. For myself. For my father.

azile
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