Given heartbreak

You don't get anything until you are... erm... given it.
You don't wait, waiting is an illusion, you really just prepare yourself. You make your body/mind/self/anything ready for whatever it is that comes next. Because it is nothing but a surprise. An awaited birthday and Christmas, every time. In my case... It came in the shape of an unexpected mini heartbreak. Oh did I not Expect to give it all away and stay trembling in the light of a boy who doesn't care. Not me. I have seen it all pretty much. I still remain naive. Now I sit in the light of a monitor knowing nothing but to spill what his brief visit to my insides did to me. If it stopped being his birthday (right now) for a very short time... and I could go back to my careless facce... and saying that that is a bad topic is a light. inspiration comes back in the shape of a rhyme or a rap. complexity of feelings, or future destiny and mind. so sharp. I always ignored what caused me harm, as the natural reaction that I think everyone does... I expected for him like valleys expect water. I gave him so much, but premature flowers never get to fill the quota. I am a lonely pioneer. Expect the new frontier and kip-nap all that's dear. Only alone I will ail the pain. Oh yes, it is you and me, we meet, again.